And now, for Something Completely Different

I am not going to apologize for this, something needs to be lightened up here. My "conversation" with Gary has left me broody and ill-tempered. Then ALa at blonde sagacity had to break this story about fart-free beans. Do the people who concocted this idea really think we eat the things for the taste? Of course not. It is for the potential comedic value of a window-rattling trouser trumpet. The sheer fun of competition. You know with bonus points for an exceptionally gross sounding one. Deductions for "drawing mud". And now they are trying to deprive me of one of my remaining leasures in life. I have to smoke my pipes and cigars on the porch as it is. Now they want to do away with the only real reason to subject ourselves to the flavor of beans. Oh the humanity!